wet beard kisses

[wet beard kisses]

i know i wince when you give me wet beard kisses
fresh out the shower
but as i wipe my cheeks i know i used to dream of a love that couldn’t be bothered
with drying off
and its not fair that i can’t say this to your face
but thank you for each drop
that you’ve traded in for my little scoffs
because i used to dream of a love that couldn’t be bothered with drying off

and i’d do it all again

its nothing like i could have imagined, you know
it’s not my fault my parents never kissed in the kitchen
or while putting away the dishes
or stole 7 minutes in the pantry
or found a way to laugh together at a funeral

so how could i have known
we were only 26 years old
and it’s nothing like i could have imagined, you know?

and i’m scared of everything
(im not hyperbolic)
so i mean this
i still feel safest
when you hold my hand as you lead me through a crowd
perhaps its symbolic
the way i fight you to prove my independence
but as soon as the space closes in i gladly take your hand

and i don’t even look ahead

i watch your feet
i feel the skin between your knuckles
your hands are always warmer
and i don’t need to look ahead

perhaps its symbolic or perhaps i hate crowds

see? even now
im fighting
why do i fight you to prove my independence
when we both know as soon as the space closes in
i gladly take your hand

i don’t even look ahead
and i’d do it all again

do i say it enough in my own little ways?
i’m afraid you don’t notice how i say it
i always pick up the coffee, you know?
though we both make it,
depending on all the factors we’ve negotiated

you get Mondays i get the rest
and you always drink yours like breathing
a quick pour - gone
i take my time
and i take my time to pick up the coffee
it’s nothing
but its everything
i have so many things to say in my own little ways

is it enough?
I promise to always pick the coffee up

after all these years it’s the nothings that mean the most
the way you leave the fridge on “ice”, you know?
when i always only use water
but if i had the settings all to myself
i’d be in hell
(im not hyperbolic)
i just need the little signs of you
the way you always make room for my shampoo
its nothing
but it’s everything

not to be hyperbolic but id die right here this instant
if i had to live on without wincing
from your dreaded wet beard kisses

i used to only dream of a love
that couldn’t be bothered with drying off

until next time- cd